Array Wars

What do you get when you cross Star Wars with The Matrix? Well, I don't know what you would get, but when I tried it, and threw in numerous other references (most notably from Serenity) for good measure, I ended up with Array Wars!

If I were to apply a rating to the following, it would probably be "MA 15+"; it contains some reasonably adult humour and situations.

Episode 1.0: The New Hope Strikes Back

Bored with life on his uncle's farm, Lurk Splitwhisker craved adventure and excitement out amongst the stars. When a pair of fugitive bots brought a cryptic message from a beautiful princess, he learned an invaluable lesson:

BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR...

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, a struggle was waged between the forces of light and dark. Mystical energies rippled throughout the inhabited systems, and ancient prophecies came slowly, inexorably, to fruition.

A galactic Republic, keeper of the peace for a thousand generations, withered and died in the shadow of an evil dictator's greedily outstretched hands, and its remains were crushed beneath the armoured boot heels of Imperial troops.

Only a few defenders of the old ways survived, escaping the ruthless pogrom and fleeing to the far reaches of the galaxy. Biding their time, rebuilding their strength, they finally re-emerged to launch a rebellion against the tyranny of the Empire.

This is not that story.

Thus begins my first novel, Array Wars Episode 1.0: The New Hope Strikes Back. To read more, simply follow the link below to read it online; alternatively you may download the entire novel in a single PDF file -- the same file I used for POD printing -- and read it offline at your leisure. This is the version I recommend, because it's prettier; however, it weighs in at around 2Mb (because of the couple of pictures in it.)

Episode 2.0: Return of the Phantom Menace

Pursued across the galaxy by the might of the Imperium, the Rebel Coalition has taken refuge on a remote wasteland. For Lurk Splitwhisker and his friends, this reprieve is to be short-lived:

A NEW FOE HAS JOINED THE CHASE!

The galaxy is in disarray. In the wake of their defeat at the battle of Yawn, the Galactic Imperium is struggling to recover. Terrorists from the Rebel Coalition, striking from their hidden base, have destroyed the pride of the fleet, the Devastator station—and those things aren't cheap!

Barth Vapour, Hard Lord of the Stiff, is missing.

The Imperator himself is rumoured to be little more than a puppet to a shadowy mastermind.

Use of the hallucinogenic spice-drug, Menaajatwaa, has become so widespread as to threaten the core tenets of the Imperium: security and stability.

Is one of these the "Phantom Menace", or does that title belong to the weird kid down the road who wears his purple underpants on his head?

Read on...

To read more, simply follow the link below to read it online; alternatively you may download the entire novel in a single PDF file -- the same file I used for POD printing -- and read it offline at your leisure. This is the version I recommend, because it's prettier; however, it weighs in at around 2Mb (because of the couple of pictures in it.)

Episode 3.0: Attack of the Stiff

Planned for release in December 2007. (Right after I write it during NaNoWriMo 2007!)

How Array Wars came to be

For more details on how I came to write 'Array Wars', check out my NaNoWriMo page.